I am especially proud of it, because I am absolutely sure that no one has formulated SUCH a LAW before me or even thought about this PERMANENT PHENOMENON!

The law states:

The more incompetent and stupid the content of the written text, the more luxurious its printed edition looks.

Examples:

Biography of I.V. Stalin, which was published in 1949, and, as Solzhenitsyn notes in the novel “In the First Circle”, “They say that it goes well”!

You bet! All Soviet people, young and old, rushed to read this wonderful story.

My Mother, a young worker, was stripped of her salary without even asking, and on the day she received a certain amount for half a month, she was solemnly presented with his “Sacred Biography” AS A GIFT from the Leader. And Stalin, of course, was informed of the holy truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth: “The book sells out instantly!”

The first edition was published in 7,376,000 copies!

But it was sold out so quickly, eager to be impressed by the radiance emanating from this brilliant biography, that in June 1952 the second edition was released, numbering one million more – 8,375,000 copies!

Total: 15,751,000!!! This is what the great talent and heroic deeds of the Leader and Teacher, the Genius of all times and peoples and the Luminary of all sciences mean!

It was published on fine chalk paper and is still kept in my library, not tarnished at all over the years and not yellowed by the whiteness of the pages.

Hillary Clinton’s nonsense has been published in a million copies and also on excellent glossy paper.

The novel by the brilliant English writer Evelyn Waugh, “The Loved One”, is published in a paper-soft cover and on the same gray-yellowish paper, which cannot compare in printing with Clinton’s “memoirs”!

“Maxims and moral reflections” by Duke Francois de La Rochefoucauld, the smartest man – similarly, softcover and newsprint!

The scientific-historical physics-rhyming poem by Y.S.Solomonov on as many as 222 pages with the intriguing title “The Nuclear World” was published no less luxuriously, however, in 2019 and in a slightly smaller edition – 1000 copies.

“Lubyanka does not sleep at night,

Although she have been tired for many years,

Forging a sword into a shield,

And shutting up our mouth’s screaming”

Igor Garik

Y.S.Solomonov is the general designer of the Shield and Sword of the Soviet power and, at the same time, an outstanding thinker and poet!

After all, this is the first and only historical-physics-rocket-nuclear-construction poem in the world, written in such verses, compared to which Pushkin and Lermontov are just pathetic rhymers!

Pushkin, for example, is as stupid to the exact sciences as …, the only geophysically literate description is in “The Bronze Horseman” – and only four lines:

“But the wind driving from the bay

Dammed Neva back, and she receding

Came up, in wrath and riot speeding

And soon the islands flooded lay. “

This is the 222 pages of Solomonov’s poems on NUCLEAR MISSILE topics that Pushkin never even dreamed of!

And here are examples of OTHER printing.

Ilf and Petrov’s brilliant, incompetent “laughing stock” novels “The Twelve Chairs” and “The Little Golden Calf” were published later than Stalin’s biography, on cheap newsprint and with dull, NOT even BLACK, but grayish printed text. They probably turned yellow in the store!

Leonid Solovyov’s beautiful and equally incompetent dilogy “The Tale of Khodzha Nasreddin” is similarly the same cheap newsprint. It turned yellow and began to tear like ancient sailcloths, although the latter are thousands of years old.

The sister of the educated merchant Karzinkin, Elena Karzinkina-Teleshova, in whose house evenings of reading by Russian writers were held at the beginning of the last century, complained to Bunin’s wife, Vera Muromtseva–Bunina:

“Of all my friends, only Yuli Alekseevich (I. Bunin’s older brother) read as much as I did,” – she said with regret, – “writers generally read little…”

(Elena Andreevna Karzinkina-Teleshova was an outstanding person not only in literature, but also in general character: She couldn’t stand killing, and an entire stable was given over to blind horses on their estate!)

So the summary is a repeat:

If, citizens, you want your masterpieces to live long and look decent even after fifty years, WRITE AS STUPIDLY AND INCOMPETENTLY AS POSSIBLE!

Excellent printing is guaranteed for your opuses!

And if, unfortunately, you have talent, then write only “in the drawer” of the table!

Into the «box», into the «box», where you will jump and lay after them.

Because even if your creations are published, it will be in an edition of one hundred or three hundred copies and on paper that will crumble already in the publisher’s warehouse.

Yes, and who needs it if no one has been reading for a long time, but everyone is JUST WRITING

(see above!)!

If I’m wrong, let my seniors correct me.

30 IX 2025